thank you for the kind comments from the previous post. i was surprised at the interest in my writing. frankly, i am more of a picture person vs. a reader…so, i guess i assumed what i wrote was the least important part. so, thank you for reading. with that said, let me go off on some more tangents.
i have made the decision to leave the cabin. it was a hard one, but i feel confident it is the right one for now. i am sad to not see some of the things around the property come to life or change in the fall, but anxious to see what kinds of things can surprise me still the next month. i haven’t a clue where i shall end up after this. denver is an option, putting my stuff in storage and roaming around seems to be the main focus. there is something super exciting about that, as well as a bit daunting. where will i end up after it all? it is possible i will wander on forever.
even though most of my thoughts lately have been about leaving the cabin, oddly enough, i find myself missing LA again. the past few days i have been listening to some old yo la tengo albums. the one’s that were on repeat in my first apartment in LA. music always takes me right back. i can almost taste the foods i ate back then, i can see myself as i was- the clothes i wore, driving in my car, the feelings i had. after getting through the first year there i started to find a little place for myself. i stayed up late, drank lots of wine, had a very large stack of cd’s accumulating in my living room, made t-shirts with lace and dye, took polaroids, and was just starting my career. seems like yesterday, seems like forever ago. back when i was a magazine horror, wore converse, was addicted to amoeba and friendster, and had a very large boxy computer. i’m not sure why these memories are popping up in my head lately. maybe, leaving the cabin somehow means i am leaving LA behind too.
everyday, i have been taking walks around the property. piking wildflowers for bouquets and yesterday, i spent the afternoon harvesting all sorts of these other goodies. sucking in all that the sunshine and mountains behold. stopping to see what surrounds me, to see what is growing. you should try it sometime, you might be surprised what you find. every single day i see a new flower, a new plant, hell, yesterday, i discovered a cherry tree outside my bedroom window. for the past month i thought it was an apple tree with stunted apples, but a few started changing color and i stopped to look up and realized they were cherries…i was ecstatic. as i walked away from my new exciting discovery i remembered how sad i was to leave LA and all the lush vegetation of my backyard. the lemon tree, the fig tree, the rosemary bush…never would i have guessed i would have found all that i have here, in colorado. it reassured me of the future, that it can always surprise you.
there are a million apple trees around the property. a few pear trees, tons of chokecherry bushes, a grapevine, now a cherry tree, and even a peach tree, though she isn’t producing anything this year. it has been raining a lot- thunderstorms or clouds almost everyday. there are a plethora of mushrooms growing everywhere. i havent a clue what kind they are, nor do i intend to find out. i know a lot of the puffball mushrooms have turned out to be poisonous. i am continually fascinated by the eco system i am living in. the cabin sits in a bowl down by the river, allotting for shade and sun with rich soil from the river. a short walk up the road and you are in a desert. open space and to my surprise tons and tons of sage growing. i can’t begin to explain my joy when i discovered it…which i will try in my next post about the harvesting of it. i have even discovered yarrow on the property . there are cacti and all sorts of strange looking desert flowers. i have never stopped to notice a pine tree growing it’s branches, or what a baby pine cone looks like.
it is the perfect combo of desert and mountain…. because it is just that -a mountain desert.
then there is my own garden. i admit, i have been a little bit lazy about it. i have it watered on a timer, and only occasionally do i go over to trim and de-weed. the tomatos are doing pretty decent, but some of the other things, like the zucchini, are growing slowly. i have been a little too lazy to figure it out though. i’m just happy with whatever she wants to provide me with, naturally. one evening, the sun was glowing on the garden. the colors were so incredible. one of my favorite things to do everyday is to visit her and see how she is doing…what’s newly ripe or getting bigger.
i am so thankful for the bounty this place has surprised me with. nature, is my church, it is my god. it’s what allows me to discover what i hold within myself. i couldn’t be more thankful for the time i have spent here. i know in my heart, i will find my way back to this lifestyle time and time again.
i suppose , ten years down another road, i will put on that yo la tengo album again, remembering these moments now…walking outside my back door discovering a cherry tree, harvesting a basket of sagebrush, and breathing in the smell of pine.
never underestimate the small moments- my biggest lesson thus far.